Fret

I wish I could have been with him.
I really do. More than anything.

Sigh.

I'm so tired. I just don't wanna do anything and I want someone to tell me love exists. Because everywhere around me, I see it collapsing. I want love. I want a life. I want my life here to end. I want to go on and get away. Away, from my childhood, my memories, from everything.. So I can start anew.. And I can live with more and less important things.
Poor Wess'.

Denial is pain. Indecision is most painful of all.
And rejection. How many have I had? Well, nothing has ever worked.

My head and my life and soul hurts. It all goes downwards. Spiraling downwards, exhaustion and hardly enough will to continue.
I don't like this.
I never have fun, I never enjoy. I never love nor feel. I want my dreams to become reality and I want everything to bedazzling just for a while. So I can remember, what it's like..
It never works.

Dreams..
How come they don't come true?