-Sigh-

At least my headache's gone...
But I think it's the placebo affect.

The only thing about taking pills is, I feel like one of those crazy people who will lose it when I 'haven't had my pills'. I'm hoping it'll do something.. work.. because that'd be nice.

But now if anyone asks, I can say I take it for my insanity. That I kill things if I don't have them. *laugh* I'll say it completely serious.
jffjfjfjfjjaghowan.sdaoawonfwa..d.saohfw. Stress busting.

Funny. Mom acts concerned. She doesn't know I feel like this every day. Beecaause I don't tell her. So it's 'odd'.
Ah fooking hell. I'm only fifteen and I take pills! Pills!

But why is it that it got worse? I don't mean now, I mean, over time.. I get more and more tense about it. Maybe because now I have more to hide? I guess so. Talking to Zandry, I don't want people looking over my shoulder.
As you realize, as it comes to mind that people will judge you at every moment in your life, it can really make you crazy. You're trying to keep it from happening, which is impossible. You're thinking of every eye that sets on you, and regretting what they may see, think, feel. When you don't even know. You feel afraid, wondering what they're thinking. Feel guilt nearly, for how you might make them feel, just by witnessing you. That girl over there, when she looked with that expression, was she jealous? Does she loath me for having a better figure? I'm sorry to do that, she must understand, she doesn't have to........ It aches at the back of your mind, even though you don't think of it much.. Still feel it. .... .. Tis how I feel... ..

I felt that exact feeling in the bookstore a few days ago.. ......
Wish such little things wouldn't bug me.