Oh great..

Apparently I have visters from HELL.

http://hell.oddwebsite.com/viewtopic.php?t=4043

Hello there. Haha. I shouldn't have signed up for that damned place. =P Hell forums. I blame Alex. To hell with him. :D
Oh well.
Mwaha. He called me a camera whore, with an internet boyfriend. No wait, who just broke up with her internet boyfriend. Haha. Oh well.
I praise blog patrol for letting me witness the horror. *shakes head* Hah.. ha..

He sounds like Alex, waay too much. Well.. I guess I'm used to being laughed at for having an 'internet boyfriend' or whatever you wish to call it. But, who cares. Woot. That gave me a good wince.
Megatokyo isn't as good as it used to be..
Hm..
I guess it is the fun of the internet, isn't it? You can point at people and laugh. "Haha! That freak likes hamtaro!" and stuff. Well well... It's amusing how people enjoy mocking others.. *shakes head*

Hey. If you're from hell, why don't you just say "hi"?
You can. It'd give me an idea of how much stir and mockery I'm gonna get all over the internet. Well.. Again, I don't really care. *shakes head*
It'll make me miss Alex less, older bro. I'll have the internet to mock me instead of him. Hahaha.

But jeez, I'm not that bad, am I? Yeeesh.. I have a good friend in a different country whom I like, is that such a problem? I'm gloomy a lot, I like to talk a lot, is that so bad? Well, whatever. I feel like I'm talking to myself.
--

Staring at my hands. They shake. Hoo hoo. Nothing better to go to bed to than 20 people laughing at you, and more to come. Well well.. Smile. I made you laugh. So.. I'll laugh with you?

Haha.. Oh my god.. this girl is such an idiot.. Hahhahahaha.
She fell for someone who she can't see, she's the classic teen of today, full of angst! With her beloved internet boyfriend. She chats with him everyday, haha. Angsty angsty emo kid. Silly teenager. She likes anime, god, how can she? That shit is way too dumb. She dyed her hair! Goth! Haha..


I'd go cry in a corner, but I'm too old for that, so I'll laugh. I'm used to people saying "fuck you" from those years of the hair dye, so it's no different. Just wave hello to the visiting fools, and smile. You're not one of them. You're not one who points and laughs at people you don't know. So.. Smile. Everyone.. Is so full of stereotypes. People are people, I have no labels to stick on each I see. I see a person, a soul, and a way of life. So I don't care how many think I'm that angsty kid. Because I can smile, even knowing this. Assume all you want. ..
I'll try not to hate you.
Alex is right. High school is full of idiots. That's why I don't have many good friends. Hm..
Well, surprise, no spam. But I'll wait, carrying a bat and two wavering hands.
I'll try not to hate you. Well well.. What a lovely thing. Zandry is gone for a week.. Try to smile.
I remember, he shouted it out the window at me. He said "FUCK YOUR PURPLE HAIR" as loud as he could while he drove by. My grandma was with me. I felt tense, awkward, and then shrugged. It's the price I pay, to be colorful. Life is boring. So I spice it up with odd clothes and colors. I smile at strangers and wonder, who are you? Where are you from? Why are you here? But no answer will ever come to me. My camera, I have to capture each moment. I must remember those fun days, so when it gets bad, I can look and smile at that. I have to take a picture, and remember, I was that ugly, and he doesn't care.

Funny. Are any of you related to Alex? "why don't you go update your blog with some angst?" "you're such an idiot!!!" "I can't believe you and your internet emo boyfriend"

"Can you punch him for me?"
"Sorry, he's too fast"

Hm... It awakens some anger. Memories.
Whacks and pain and self-conscious.. Mood swings, shaking hands, stuttering voice. Being called a freak, being stereotyped on first glance, never saying a word. I remember it. The guy who thought it'd be funny to dirty dance in my face at the dance, as I sat to the side, reading my book.. I wanted to kick him in the balls so bad, but I knew I'd be blamed. The guy who stared at me, trying to scare me. The one who followed half way home.
The one who walked right behind me, saying to his friend "Hey, think I can scare her?" so I could hear, terrified. Life is funny, isn't it? Pain gives strength. I can't believe what assholes every year awakens. I can't believe how many people will want to be cruel to you, just for being yourself. I can't believe.. But it's life.

I want to talk forever. Because I'm pissed off at life. But.. ... .... ... I don't have the time. I can whine all week, when I'm lonely and tired and worried. I can go downtown and dance and run and drink hot chocolate.

I wonder. How people sleep at night, knowing what they do to others?

Oh well. Nikhil, Renan, whoever reads, don't worry about me. I'm just remembering how it was.