Shan't

I shouldn't let things hurt me so much, hm...?

I dunno.....

Emotions. Don't hurt. Don't sting.

Mmmph.. I dunno what to say now, hmm... I'm tired. How is that any different than any day..? Tired. Weary weary weary weary me. No different. Mornings and nights kill me. The time when everything wavers, everything kinda feels hopeless, at this time. Dislike it.

Why can't I think of anything more to say..?

Maybe I'll write something, of request. Shut up, don't say anything, or I'll.. I don't know.
Hell.. I can't write things like that.. *thinks* Poetry.....

Maybe I have to write it in a separate document, just so I feel like eyes are lingering on my work, so I don't feel like every mistake is watched, even though it isn't. So it feels more unofficial and less.. m. *coughs* Don't bother me.

Laughter fills my eyes
all the reddened tears,
on my cheeks they’ve dried
every stinging memory
every lingering scar
every fear,
it’s gone

I sit with you on the stairs
smile into my palms,
hide it,
hide eyes behind brown hair
threatening laughter
any second
any moment

lean my head
drop back my hands
reveal the sunshine
the cloudless skies
the doubtless,
lips that curve up
in an unexplainable,
unpredictable joy
that I can’t begin to say
why
----

I can't really think, nor write, sorry.

My eyes deep brown,
plead with yours
child inside
not a word
It says something
somethng more
silent words
unsaid,
unheard
Can you understand?

They trap you in
captured perfectly
in black and
they pry
to ask
how,
what and why
how would you stay

the gaze finally shys
to look on,
back inside
oh how she tries
fights the tears
she can’t cry
not anymore

can you see it
small child
who she tries
to hide
scared and
shy
the small child hides
within her frame