Sleepy Tanya

This morning was hectic.. *sigh*
So.. Mm.. I mean, everything just seemed to go wrong. I didn't eat breakfast, or lunch. Didn't have time to pack, didn't have time to eat. I finished my project, but it sucked. I did wake up early enough, and I'm annoyed that if I had five more minutes I would have made it, got it all completely done.

I'm so exhausted.. I don't even know what to say. Just sink down lower in my chair... Disappointing, everything. *sinks* Maybe I'll take a nap here, in this chair. Maybe it's not good for my back.. But who cares.

On the bus ride home I thought of another random idea. But this time, photography. I thought it'd be fun to be a statue. You know.. Paint your skin completely greyish bluish white, and yeah.. It'd just be fun. I'd love to do that. But I'd need like a gallon of makeup, and heck.. How would I pull it off? That sure would be fun, though. Statue.. Mm..

Disappointment disappointment. Just had thoughts haunting me all day, a question, and it remains unanswered. I know the answer's no, but I want to be sure. ... so.. tired.. Falling asleep, nearly..

Close my eyes. ...did you know.. that I can type without looking? I can type with my eyes closed, as they are right now... Mmm... I might fall asleep in the middle of this.. Eyes closed, eyes still closed, I can't see what I'm writing, but I think it's right. .... I needa hug. *makes a face* ....... Hmm.. But I open them now, because it almost hurts trying to keep them that way. Sleepy.. sleepy.. If I sleep now, I won't even wake up until 8.. It's hard not to.. though.. It's warm, and I'm fading into a doze, into a lightheaded feeling of the world weighing down on me. Why is it, that when you're tired, your face even feels tired? The muscles in your cheeks, your eyes, your head.. Mouth, neck, everything says tired. Smiling too much, today? I smile a lot, I'm more observant, now. But I also yawn a lot, get a blank look a lot, and write in my school journal a lot. School journal.. I've kept it all year, writing in it. Just a normal notebook, but just for my own writing, bored entries. I'll give you one, or some, or something. Sometime. Not now.

I guess I assumed that I don't smile much, because the emotion tends to fade quickly. Just gets pushed out by everything else in my day, all the work and annoyance.

Okay.. I can't stand this. I'm going to go to sleep. Back at eight, I bet. Good afternoon, goodnight, I'll be asleep if you need me. Hopefully when I wake up I'll have something.. I don't know. Something to do besides feeling tired, bored, curious, tantalized, and overcome. Bye..

But.. but.. *sigh* Mom just came home, wants to talk to me. Hopefully I'll escape to my room and fall asleep in the next twenty minutes.. God.. I'm so tired.. Wanna collapse.